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My Stories.

This is a story I wrote, just now. I call it, "The Misadventures of Dr. McZarfus , VOLUME 1." by me.

One day, the kindly jew rapper Dr McZarfus was walking down the road towards his hometown of IRAQ. Now, little did Dr McZarfus know this, but IRAQ had been overrun with SAND Gerbils, or the SG. Well, this SG happened to not like JEW-RAPPERS, so Dr McZarfus was in for quite a day.
Anyways, as he was walking into town, Dr McZarfus was stopped by a street urchin who asked him for some tissues to blow his poor running nose on. Well, as we all know, Dr Mc Zarfus is a kindly jew-Dr-Rapper, so he promised the street URCHIN that he would bring him back some tissues on his next visit.
BUT! This "STREET URCHIN" was really an undercover Russian MOB agent named Alexi Dolotov. Comrade Dolotov had been trying to break into the inner octagon of the SAND Gerbils for quite a number of years. Sadly though, the SG new all about this scheme, and thus kept all tissues locked up out of sight from comrade Dolotov, rendering his amazing powers useless.
Back to Dr McZarfus. He was headed to his home, (which was booby trapped by the SG to explode when he brushed his eyebrows next) but he realized before he got there that he was all out of tissues at home. So he decided to go to what he thought was the new store in town. THIS new store wasn't a store, it was actually the inner octagon of the SAND Gerbils. Dr McZarfus, not realizing that IRAQ is a really bad place to enter the inner octagon of the SAND Gerbils, walked in humming his latest in jew-rap-healing kindliness songs. This started to offend the covert assassin SAND Gerbils known as the FREAK PATROL. The FREAK PATROL decided to report to thier leader about current goings-on, so they vacated to the Anteroom of incredible fertility, where their SAND Gerbil leader, HILLARY CLINTON was seated. HILLARY CLINTON's closest advisor Rosie O'Donnell was smoking crack out of a bread machine, when the FREAK PATROL entered, Cursing loudly in Italian about the Jew Rapper, Dr McZarfus. Rosie O'Donnell choked on her crack cocaine exclaiming with a loud voice that no one must be watching the secret tissue stash! OH NO! HILLARY CLINTON jumped out her lesbomatic chair with a shout of pride, and ran out onto the balcony to see what she could see.
With all this comotion going on, one would think that Dr McZarfus would have exited the inner octagon of the SG. But Dr McZarfus is a kindly jew rapper, so he needed to stick to his promise and get some tissues for the STREET URCHIN, Alexi Dolotov. All of a sudden his McZarfus tissue sensors went off, all pointing towards the glass of orange juice sitting on the priceless piece of art. Dr McZarfus went over to investigate and discovered that it was in actuality, not a glass of orange juice, but a TISSUE-LOCKER-UPPER!!! So he grabbed all the tissues he could carry and ran out the door jew-rapping about tissue-luck.
Alexi Dolotov heard the pleasent jew-beats of Kindly Dr McZarfus, and felt his amaing powers increasing. Then! Dr McZarfus rounded the corner, and LO! BEHOLD! The magnificance that was the inner octagonal tissue stash! Dolotov felt his amaing powers as never before, ran to hug Dr McZarfus, grabbed the tissues, and ran off to break into the inner octagon of the SAND Gerbils. Once there, Dolotov used his amazing RED powers to depress the FREAK PATROL into a vertical communism. With the FREAK PATROL safely subdued for the next 50 years, Alexi Dolotov ran to the upper balcony to find HILLARY CLINTON. What he found instead was the inpenetrable force that was Rosie O'Donnel. Comrade Dolotov pulled up short, just in time to let out his jew-rapper-help call, which alerted Dr McZarfus of his predicament. Dr McZarfus then made up a kindly jer-rap that turned Rosie O'Donnell into a heterosexual entity, which then fell in love with none other than the walking dead, Mick Jagger. With her out of the way, Comrade Dolotov had no problem calling on his innate ability to summon BILL CLINTON, the only form of semi-control possible of HILLARY CLINTON. Bill Clinton wandered in 3 days later claiming to not have ever been boarded onto his plane, until he had at least 17 stiff drinks, and 3 hits off of his ex-presidential BONG.
the Moral of this story is that kindly jew-raps can solve all of IRAQ's problems. THE FREAKIN END!